I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
