On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
