How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
