i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
