I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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