margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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