I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
