Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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