Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
