you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
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Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
How drunk are you?
Completed.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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