why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
