Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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