Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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