I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
