I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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