doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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