Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
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