No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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