i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
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