Please, let me fuck your mom
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
