There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
