Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
