After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
