We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.