she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize