Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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