I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize