make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
