Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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