Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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