Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize