just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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