i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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