think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i may or may not be watching the land before time
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
