I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
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