four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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