I am puke
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I wish you could order shots online.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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