If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
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