I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
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