Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
