I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
