GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
