is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize