The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
