spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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