dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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