Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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