when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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