the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
