dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
he shaved USA in his pubs
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
