sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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